Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Expiration Date: When You Turn 35

I haven't written anything in awhile because for the past 2 weeks I had something pressing on my mind and needed to keep it to myself. Now the wait is over... I took a pregnancy test over the weekend and it came up positive! But I'll have to say it wasn't easy.

When we decided to get pregnant a few years back with Boy Wonder, I thought it would be a breeze. After trying for 6 months, I went to what I realize now was a crap doctor in Manila. She told me I had issues and probably never ovulated in my life. She said I needed to go on some medication and that she couldn't prescribe it to me because I was going back to HK. Devastated I went back and sought another doctor. One look at my charts, she said nothing out of the ordinary was wrong with me, gave me three rounds of Clomid, taught me how to check my temperature in order to keep track of my cycle and told me to come back if I still wasn't pregnant after three months. I returned to her in one month because I was pregnant. I was surprised at how quickly it happened.

When the time came to try for Nachos, which hubby has affectionately named the fetus, my doctor did the same thing. But this time she only gave me 2 rounds of Clomid and said to schedule an appointment with her immediately if I start my period after the second month. And to add to that pressure, we had guests over those 2 months. This second time round it made me realize, when did it get so hard and technical to make babies?

I signed up at Fertility Friend after reading a few threads on the net from women who were trying to get pregnant. It made me feel abit better knowing I wasn't alone in my quest. But after signing up and reading the community thread on Fertility Friend, I was amazed at just how many women there were out there faced with similar and even more difficult issues than me. Here I was getting depressed because it would be my second month trying while there were women on the boards who had been trying for years! They were not only on Clomid and taking temperatures, but they were getting injections, going to doctors weekly and using Ovulation kits. Some women had gone through tubal ligations, tubal reversals, D&C's, suffering from Endometriosis etc. The list was endless. I read threads from women who had started taking pregnancy tests obsessively and women who stopped taking pregnancy tests because they had given up hope.

When we were in college or when we first started dating, our biggest fears were getting pregnant. In highschool, our Religion teacher pulled out a large poster with different types of contraceptives on it. She then told us we were to use none of it because it was a sin. She then went on to teach us The Rhythm Method which we could use only after we're married. After her short lecture, she pointed to her 8 month tummy and said but sometimes it doesn't work. Growing up in a predominately Catholic environment, everything was geared towards not getting pregnant until you're married, that getting pregnant is the worst thing you could do. But thinking along the lines of my previous post Make Money or Babies, in addition to all that not getting pregnant movement, how come no one ever told us but if you wait too long, you might not get pregnant at all?

Growing up all we gossiped about were who got pregnant and how shocking it was that someone already had a baby before they got married. But we never heard stories of who can't have babies and the struggles they were going through. I guess advances in medicine had not caught up in those days, and so infertility was just accepted and not challenged. Today there are many options and I often hear of friends looking into fertility treatments. But I can't help but wonder, is it simply because treatments are available now, which is why we hear of them. Or does it really have something to do with the fact that more and more women are facing infertility issues now?

Had we been cautioned when we were in college or even highschool: "Look, you're not getting younger as the years go by. Yeah, try not to get pregnant when you're not married yet. But if you take too long you just might not get pregnant at all when you're ready. Unlike men, we have a finite number of good eggs. Wait too long and they could very well go bad." I wonder what difference that warning could have made were it engrained in us along with Contraceptives=Sin.

Right now I am just relieved and thankful that we've been given another little blessing. Hubby and I can't help feeling a little freaked out at the moment because of stories of failed pregnancies we just heard. We are extremely grateful and hopeful and want to take it easy without too much excitement just yet. But if things go well the rest of the year, its going to be one jam packed holiday season for us.

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